Honey, your October noir horoscope is here

Actress Carole Lombard died in a plane crash in 1942. She was 33.

Fate reigns supreme in film noir, but that doesn’t mean we don’t love us some zodiac fun. Hope your October is full of frighteningly good times. And happy birthday, Libra and Scorpio! A special shout-out and remembrances to A-list Libras Clive Owen (Oct. 3), Kate Winslet (Oct. 5), Carole Lombard (Oct. 6), Rachel McAdams (Oct. 7), Elmore Leonard (Oct. 11), Rita Hayworth (Oct. 17), Viggo Mortensen (Oct. 20), Catherine Deneuve (Oct. 22) and mighty Scorpios Julia Roberts (Oct. 28) and Truman Capote and Louis Malle (both Oct. 30).

Libra (September 24-October 23): You will gain strength and confidence, making you even more irresistible than usual. Be ready for heady romance midmonth and perhaps some terrific birthday surprises. If your b’day has passed and you acquired some good loot, try going back in time and writing a letter, you know, a penned missive that you drop in the post. Make decadence a priority at least once a week.

Scorpio (October 24-November 22): An investment pays off in a surprising way, which is especially lovely if you happen to be celebrating your birthday. It’s good to be a material girl, no? The world of money and finance can be navigated, just stick with it, even if it’s not your cup of tea. A friend may approach with an idea for a shared adventure or a great Halloween costume. Prepare for excitement! On the work front, be daring, especially on 8th – you may be on the cusp of a major innovation.

Sagittarius (November 23-December 22): “The ones that say they don’t want anything always get more in the end,” says Ann Newton, the little girl in “Shadow of a Doubt” from 1943. In 2012, though, that’s rarely the case. More often than not, if you don’t speak up, you won’t get. So be vocal and, at work, have a good case for why you deserve what you’re asking for. On the romantic front, let yourself be wicked – as often as possible!

Clive Owen turns 48 on Oct. 3. Another round on me. Marc Horn photo.

Capricorn (December 23-January 20): Though it is your nature to give freely, remember that not everyone is wired that way so if an offer comes your way midmonth, be sure to examine whether there are strings attached that might not be apparent at first glance. On the 21st, surrender to pleasure. And on the 31st, calories don’t count, so grab yourself a goody bag or 12 and dig in. Diets be damned!

Aquarius (January 21-February 19): A fiendish impulse overtakes you on the 6th. By all means, follow it! Then, in honor of Halloween, invite a few of your friends over so you can lead them astray. Pour some Chianti, watch “The Silence of the Lambs” and gorge on candy. At work, remember that overnight sensations are few and far between. More often, major success is the result of patience and perseverance. Whatever you do, don’t give up! The 12th and 21st will be lucky days.

Pisces (February 20-March 20): A bothersome situation calls for decisive action. Brandish a big old kitchen knife, boss anyone who gets in your way and feel the power! You’re good at being in charge, it’s a gift that should be cherished, not hidden. Then get your aggressions out on a hapless pumpkin. You may hit a rough patch with someone in your inner circle, perhaps a lover or Sig Oth. Don’t rush through this or look for a quick fix – it will, in the end, bring you closer. Definitely choose trick if given a choice.

Matt Damon turns 42 this year. His birthday is Oct. 8.

Aries (March 21-April 20): “I lied. I felt like lying so I did,” says Joan Crawford (an Aries) ever so nonchalantly in “Possessed” from 1947. What harm can a few little white ones do? You can always reform on Nov. 1. And of course always, no matter what the date, do only what you feel like doing. If by some strange chance, you are afflicted with notions of goodness, kindness or altruism, rest assured that a long overdue visit with a close friend and fellow femme fatale will ground you right where you belong – on the deliciously dark side.

Taurus (April 21-May 21): As Halloween approaches, Destiny is on your doorstep. There’s really not much you can do, so why fight it? Instead, invite Fate in, mix some martinis, try to make small talk. True, you may be screwed but if that’s the case, there are bound to be some fun fireworks first. And more than likely Fate has bigger and better plans for you – like a slew of good luck and winning the lottery. You should probably start packing for the south of France as soon as you finish your yummy cocktail. The weekend of the 12th may be memorably romantic.

Gemini (May 22-June 21): “I don’t play monsters. I play men besieged by fate and out for revenge,” said the inimitable Vincent Price (May 27, 1911 – Oct. 25, 1993). As you ponder whether is revenge really worth it, you may come to the considered conclusion, “Hell, yes!” Of course, there is something to be said for that living well theory, especially if it involves an elegant dinner or perhaps a shopping binge. Your calendar suddenly fills up very quickly so trust that you will have somewhere to wear that new LBD.

Ryan Reynolds (newly married to Blake Lively) will be 36 on Oct. 23.

Cancer (June 22-July 23): Having trouble choosing a costume? Choose the one that’s most daring and shows off your best features. Then find ways to wear it more than once and why rule out the gym, yoga studio or grocery store? People take life entirely too seriously. Make it your goal to mix it up this month and vary your routine, especially when it comes to your love life. Your curiosity and sensitivity serve you well on the 18th but remember to weigh options carefully.

Leo (July 24-August 23): You may encounter sudden resistance or abrupt withdrawal from a contributor to a project. Frankly, it’s rather shocking for you. So, you fret: Did I say the wrong thing? Was page 47 of my report slightly creased? Was it wrong to wear fish-nets and thigh-high boots to our last meeting? No, no and no! Unless of course the fish-nets were drafty and you caught a chill. Don’t overthink this or take it personally. The project will go on and may even improve as a result of this development. And good God, if all that stress doesn’t justify a little romantic fling, I don’t know what does.

Virgo (August 24-September 23): Feeling overwhelmed? Well, no one ever said that treachery, entrapment and general bad-girlness wasn’t a major time-suck. Hair and makeup alone consume precious slots in your schedule. Make a master list of everything you’d like to accomplish, prioritize, set deadlines and don’t look back! If you can’t get to everything or have to knock a few items off the list, don’t feel guilty. Better to complete a few really flawless seductions than to fritter your energy away on endless flirtations. But rest assured you will be irresistible when you decide to turn on the charm. On the 7th, there may be extra cash in your pocket.

Comments